Guest blog: A Homily on Compassion by Doanld Vish

Last Sunday the President of Interfaith Paths to Peace delivered a stirring homily on the topic of compassion. His words were part of an interfaith service at the conclusion of the national convention in Louisville of The National Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty (NCADP). The service was designed by IPP and was co-hosted by IPP and the NCADP.

We thought we would share Don's eloquence with you. Here is the text of his homily:

Compassion

How Do We Enlarge the Great Circle of Compassion?

A Homily Prepared for Delivery
January 17, 2010
National Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty Annual Meeting
Louisville, KY

By: Donald Vish

***



Thank you for staying for this part of the program--the homily. All the religions of the world agree on one thing for sure: there’s no thief worse than a bad sermon. So special thanks to each of you for your trust and your faith in remaining in this room.

When I was first asked to preach a homily on compassion I said "No. I am willing to preach to the choir but I'm not willing to preach to the pope. What can I possibly say about compassion to an audience that's got Sister Helen and my patron saint Bud Welsh in it? The only thing Sister Helen is going to like about me is that I don't talk with an accent." So, "No way" I said.

Have any of you every tried to tell Fr. Pat "No." (Patrick Delahanty is the chair of the Kentucky Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty and a lobbyist for the Catholic Conference). Well try it and you'll learn why he is such a successful lobbyist in Frankfort.

So, here I am. 

My invitation to speak so to speak included specific instructions to answer the question:



How Do We Enlarge the Great Circle of Compassion?



I’m going to answer that question. I’m just not going to answer it very quickly. I wouldn’t be a very good preacher if I got to the point too soon.



The Golden Rule: (Say it. You know the words): do unto others as you would have others do unto you.



That’s a good rule of good sense. It’s valuable as a cornerstone of justice. It’s a solid metric for fairness. It’s true in the same way it’s true to say: whoever smiles will always have a reason to smile.



But the Golden Rule is not an expression of compassion.



First, it affirms otherness, thee and me that leads to thine and mine. Secondly, it is ever so slightly animated with self-interest expressing in Elizabethan language what the 3-card Monte dealer says more plainly about the arc of justice: what goes around comes around.



Plato’s dictum comes closer to compassion: be kind, everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.



Plato’s sermon is built on empathy not compassion. Empathy is based on perception, understanding. Empathy is neither sympathy nor pity each of which relates to the adverse impact someone else’s suffering has on us! 

Sympathy means ‘fellow feeling’ and requires a certain degree of equality. Pity, on the other hand, regards its object as weak and hence as inferior.

 We have place in Kentucky we call down home. Everybody knows where it is. Down home they like to say pity don't cost nothing 'cause pity ain't worth nothing.

Compassion is the selfless disposition to relieve human suffering. It soars above empathy and sympathy and pity. Compassion is the noblest trait of human nature. Dante would call it caritas, pure love with no expectation of a quid pro quo.



Make no mistake: many good works are built on the Golden Rule, on empathy, on sympathy, on pity and on lesser motives like fame and glory and vanity and self-interest. They all count. But compassion is in a class by itself.

When General Agamemnon was ready to launch 1000 ships to invade Troy, he had two problems: the first one is so typical of blood vengeance—no one knew how to get to Troy. They attacked the wrong country.

Blood vengeance is always ready to act before its ready to act. Vengeance never misses an opportunity to miss an opportunity. It is ever and always aimless and misdirected even though its arc is predictable and certain: it comes around then goes around. 



Like Macbeth’s vaulting ambition, vengeance o’erleaps itself and then falls on itself.



Agamemnon’s second problem was the lack of wind. The ships could not sail. The man had 1000 sai boats and no wind. So he made a bargain with the gods—he sacrificed his daughter for a favorable breeze. Then the ships sailed for Troy and war began.

Agamemnon’s murder of his daughter ensured that he would return home from war to more war. 

Under the law of blood vengeance, his daughter’s mother was obligated to murder him—and she did; and under the law of blood vengeance her son was obligated to murder her—and he did; and under the law of blood vengeance, her daughter was obligated to murder her brother…and so it goes.



The arc of vengeance is as sure and as certain as the laws of mathematics: a series ending where it begins, and repeating itself. 

Those words are the dictionary definition of a circle—as well as a complete treatise on blood vengeance.

Like a pebble dropped into a pond, vengeance sends out ripple after ripple each extending its sphere until it runs out of space or spends itself.

Vengeance is a circle.

 A circle delineates, it defines and separates the inside from the outside. The circle is closed. Any segment of a circle is a curved line.



In architecture, a curved line is pretty but it’s weak. Leonardo reflected on the weakness of curved lines and made an astounding observation: two curved lines when propped up against each other form an arch: one of the strongest formations in architecture. So an arch is a strength created by two weaknesses.



Here’s the answer to the question—enlarge the circle of compassion by never closing it.



Keep the circle open. Reach out, join hands with one another in a tangible display of unity, solidarity and connectedness; but let those on each end extend an open hand to the world at-large as an invitation to others to join hands.



Let the circle of compassion be like Leonardo’s arch, a strength comprised of many weaknesses.

The cascading emotional damage resulting from homicides.

When a violent act occurs, the emotional devastation that results cascades out in all directions, like lava froma volcano, devastating everything in its path, harming not only the victim's family, but also the family of the perpatrator.

I have just been touched by such a cascade myself, though indirectly.

Because of a new initiative that Interfaith Paths to Peace plans to undertake with a local church, we plan to monitor and ritually mourn each homicide that happens in the Louisville metro area this year. On Sunday I learned that, sadly, Louisville's first homicide of 2010 had happened on on New Years Day. The victim was a woman in her twenties who was allegedly stabbed to death by her former boyfriend , a man who also happens to be the father of her infant child. The perpatrator also stabbed and critically wounded a man who happened to be with the young woman at the time of the crime.

Yesterday, I learned that the homicide victim is the niece of a friend of mine. When I heard that, I felt an extra twinge of pain and grief that this unnecessary violence had also emotionally wounded people that I hold dear.

As we consider the emotional cost of the violence in our community, we need to remember that the pain resulting from any violent act spreads in ever-increaing circles. Damaged forever are the friends and relatives of the victim. Also ruined are the family and friends of the troubled man who supposedly comitted this horrific crime. As I write, I am sure that phones are ringing and emails arriving in inboxes telling everyone who knew the victim and the perpatrator about the crime. More and more people over the days to come will share the sorrow.

There is little that we can do to ease this pain. There is, however work that we should all engage in to eliminate violence in our community and in our homes. I was reminded just this morning that even though the crime rate in Louisville has decreased over the last year, the rate of domestic violence has either remained the same or increased.

There are two groups in our city that are working diligently to help school age young people and the adults who work with them gain the skills that will enable them to solve serious differences with other people nonviolently. These are the Peace Education Program (http://www.peaceeducationprogram.org/ ) led by Eileen Blanton, and the SPAVA Program (http://www.spava.us/ ) pioneered by Dr. Timir Banerjee. Check out their web sites and learn what they do.

I just wish we could find a way to get the same information about non-violent conflict resolution to adults who seem to think that the best way to express their anger is with their fists, or with guns or with knives or with...

A Famous Christmas Song Born During the Cuban Missle Crisis

Sometimes the deeper significance of the Christmas holiday gets lost in all of the comercial excess in December.

Here is the story of how one of the most popular Christmas songs was born at a time when the world was on the brink of nuclear war. The song is a reminder to stop war and embrace love.

"Do You Hear What I Hear" one of the world's most beloved Christmas songs was born during the Cuban Missile Crisis in 1962 as an anti-war statement by a former French Resistance fighter from WWII who had personally suffered the ravages of war.

Noel Regney (1922-2002) was a Frenchman trained as a classical composer who was drafted into the German army in World War II. He deserted and joined the French Resistance. [During his work with the Resistance he suffered the horrors of war directly: he was shot, but survived.] After the war ended, Regney joined the French Overseas Radio Service and worked out of French Indochina until moving to Manhattan in 1952. He met Gloria Shayne while she was working as a pianist in a hotel dinning room and married her a month later.

Regney and Shayne wrote "Do You Hear What I Hear" in 1962 during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Regney drew the image of Jesus as a newborn lamb from Matthew 2:9 and 2:11 and took his lyrics to his wife to set in the reverse of their usual practice. But while it is often taken for a Christmas carol, for Regney and Shayne "Do You Hear What I Hear" is a hymn to peace. "I am amazed that people can think they know the song," Regney later said, "and not know it was a prayer for peace." Although the song has been recorded by Bing Crosby and Perry Como and over 120 others, Regney and Shayne's favorite recording was Robert Goulet's 1963 recording for its dramatic delivery and his climatic "Pray for peace, people everywhere." ~ James Leonard, All Music Guide

Here's a link to the Bing Crosby version of "Do You Hear What I Hear"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWjzTAkWLBM

And here are the lyrics:

Do You Hear What I Hear?

Said the night wind to the little lamb,

do you see what I see

Way up in the sky, little lamb,

do you see what I see

A star, a star, dancing in the night

With a tail as big as a kite

With a tail as big as a kite

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy,

do you hear what I hear

Ringing through the sky, shepherd boy,

do you hear what I hear

A song, a song, high above the trees

With a voice as big as the sea

With a voice as big as the sea

Said the shepherd boy to the mighty king,

do you know what I know

In your palace warm, mighty king,

do you know what I know

A Child, a Child shivers in the cold

Let us bring Him silver and gold

Let us bring Him silver and gold

Said the king to the people everywhere,

listen to what I say

Pray for peace, people everywhere!

listen to what I say

The Child, the Child, sleeping in the night

He will bring us goodness and light

He will bring us goodness and light

Lessons We Can Learn from Peacemakers in the 5th Grade

I am serving as a volunteer mentor this winter in a special program called SPAVA that allows me to share non-violent conflict resolution skills with 5th graders at Bates elementary school in Louisville. You can find details about SPAVA (and volunteer for the program) at http://www.spava.us/.

One young student in my class shared an idea with me last week that I found deeply moving and full of creativity well beyond the years of this young person.

I had given my 29 students a take home assignment. I asked them to think of a major problem in the world that they would like to solve and then describe a machine that they would create to address that problem.

Wonderful ideas were shared by these 5th graders about how to eliminate hunger, cure diseases, and provide housing for everyone in the world, but one idea in particular grabbed my attention. It related to anger.

Anger is one of the major problems for students in our public schools. Probably all students feel anger. In fact we tell them it's ok to feel angry. But these fifth graders (like the rest of us) get into trouble when they respond to their anger by acting impulsively, without thinking.

So we teach them how to use a method pioneered by SPAVA called STAR.

In the STAR method students take 4 key steps to solving their problems non-violently these are:

S STOP! Cool down so you don’t do something impulsive that you
may regret later. Take a deep breath and count to 5 or do something else that works for you.
T THINK! What is the real problem? What are your choices? Ask about each choice: Does it respect everyone? Will it work? Pick your best choice.
A ACT! Carry out your best choice.
R REVIEW! Ask yourself, “Did it work? If it did, great! If it didn't, try another choice.

The students hadn't yet learned the STAR method when I gave them the assignment to address a major problem in the world. In spite of that, one young woman came up with an idea that was a perfect reflection of what we hope for through STAR.

She shared with me and members of her class that destructive anger was the problem she wanted to eliminate. She "invented" a machine that would sense your anger and turn it into beautiful music that would soothe you and calm you down. I love that idea. And I wish we had more inventors like my young friend.

And again, here is a link to information about SPAVA. I hope you will become a mentor in this brilliant program.

http://www.spava.us/

Ashokan Farewell: Honoring the memory of dead friends and relatives

Last Thursday was the 41st anniversary of the death of Thomas Merton. Interfaith Paths to Peace and St. William Church here in Louisville hosted a noontime vigil for peace in Afghanistan that day to mark the anniversary.

But as I look back, last week was one that was filled with death and the reminders of death.

Last Monday night I participated in the annual Memorial Service of Mothers Against Drunk Driving. The service honors the memory of those killed in the last year by drivers who were under the influence of alcohol or drugs. That event was attended by about 120 survivors and family members of those being remembered. It also was attended by over 200 people who are part of a diversion program operated by our county prosecutor's office. This program directs offenders to attend the memorial service as a way of reminding them what the results of drunk driving can be. I found the service deeply compelling for two reasons: my Uncle Mac was killed by a drunk driver when I was 10; and though I have never been arrested for drunk driving, I am a recovering alcoholic .

Other things served as reminders too.

One was last Wednesday's noontime meditation. I lead a noontime meditation once a month built around the concept of "Lectio Divina" a meditation that can take people into a deeper understanding of scripture and sacred stories from the world's many religions. The story we meditated on this last Wednesday was very much concerned with how we deal with our memory of the dead. Here's what we read:

Many African societies divide humans into three categories: those still alive, the sasha, and the zamani. The recently departed whose time on earth overlapped with people still here are the sasha., the living dead. They are not wholly dead, for they live in the memories of the living who can call them to mind, create their likeness in art, and bring them to life in anecdote.

When the last person to know an ancestor dies, that ancestor leaves the sasha for the zamani, the dead.

As generalized ancestors, the zamani are not forgotten but revered. Many can be recalled by name. But they are not living dead.

--the epigraph from the book, The Brief History of the
Dead

A final jolt came when I learned on Thursday afternoon that the 52 year old husband of a friend had died suddenly of a heart attack that morning. The weekend was filled with services and preparations for meals aimed at easing the grief of the widow and her sons.

To honor Merton and all of the dead I have been thinking about, I offer here a link to the song, Ashokan Farewell. The link contains not only the tune but also the composer telling the story of how the song came to be. I first heard it years ago whenI watched the Ken Burns documentary about the Civil War. In the documentary it was a repeated motif reflecting the grimness of war and violence. The tune is sad, and sounds like a longing for home, or a lament for a lost love, or the bittersweet memory of those we miss.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sx6dxrhqPZY

President Obama's New Plans for Afghanistan

Yesterday afternoon I received a call from Peter Smith, religion reporter for our local newspaper, the Louisville Courier-Journal. Peter had been given the task of contacting individuals representing local peace groups for reactions to the President's speech later that evening on his plans for sending more troops to Afghanistan.



My comments were included in the article which appeared this morning. Here is a link:



http://www.courier-journal.com/article/20091201/NEWS01/912010362/Military+action+alone+won+t+solve+Afghanistan+s+problems++Louisville+residents+say



I said that I had hoped that with the coming of a new administration we would be looking for peaceful ways to solve our differences with other countries. I commended the President on having a clearly set out exit strategy (although I said I would have been happier if he were pulling our troops out sooner).



There is something I didn't say there that I would like to say here. I am generally opposed to wars and violence of all kinds. But for those who plan and execute wars, there is something that should be remembered. Undertaking a war without a clear understanding for leaders and the public alike of what would constitute winning (and loosing) leads to disaster. We saw that in Vietnam. We witnessed it again in Iraq. I fear that once again we find ourselves mired in a conflict that will hold onto us with a death grip because we can't clearly explain, simply explain what it would mean to win in Afghanistan.



I think the best strategy is to get out. Now.

The Often Unheard Voice of Muslims Denouncing Violence

Last night I attended the second annual dinner of the Council of Islamic Organizations of Kentucky (CIOK). The dinner program (which was attended by hundreds of people, including Jews and Christians) began with a moment of silence honoring the victims of the massacre that occurred at Ft. Hood last week.

What is remarkable about that is that I often hear people say that Muslims don't acknowledge or denounce violence committed by members of their religion.

In fact they do, and they are speaking out more forcefully and more frequently.

There was an article in last Friday's Courier-Journal in which reporter Peter Smith asked local, regional and national Islamic leaders for comments about the horrifying shootings in Texas. Without exception they all denounced the violence and indicated that no true practitioner of Islam would undertake such a despicable act. Those interviewed included leaders of Louisville-area Mosques (among them, a member of my organization's board: Bashar Masri), the Council of Islamic Organizations of Kentucky, and the Islamic Society of North America (the major national affiliate group for Muslims) among others.

Here is a link to Peter Smith's article, so you can read for yourself.

http://www.courier-journal.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2009911060348

In the recent past the news media often seemed to report only negative things about Muslims. That is starting to change, and I congratulate Peter Smith and the Courier-Journal for seeking out articulate Muslim leaders to help us understand how Muslim Americans really feel. Moreover, the recent statements by mainstream American Muslims underscore for me the fact that our Muslim brothers and sisters each day are moving more deeply into the mainstream of American life and that they embrace the kind of peacemaking values all of us espouse. Or maybe it's just that we are finally beginning to hear about Muslim values and opinions that have been there all along. I suspect the latter is the case.